Happy New Year from the Trunk Monkey!

I Am Not Alone

Oh, how I love all the "Best of" and "Worst of" lists that inevitably pop up this time each year. This one from msnbc.com, lists and then discusses the worst songs of '06:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16300742/

I really only take issue with two of the picks - not that the songs area great, but I feel there are worse ones out there - but aside from that I think it's pretty much dead-on. Best quotes from the explanations....

On Fergie's "London Bridge" - "To be fair, this song isn’t quite as annoying as last year’s 'My Humps.' (But what is?)"

And on Hinder's "Lips of an Angel" - "This song sounds like it was scooped from Nickelback’s septic tank."

Great stuff

Drawing a total blank....

What a downer to come right off of Christmas only to be greeted with the news of the passing away of President Ford. Not that I was even alive when he was president, but from what I know about him, he was a good guy. And pardoning Nixon took serious balls.

But in my brain's typical "find a tangent no matter how slight" fashion, I started thinking about Saturday Night Live - the presidential portrayals to be exact. If memory serves me, Chevy Chase was the first cast member to accept the challenge, bringing Ford to the late-night small-screen in all his prat-fall glory. Dana Carvey's George Bush was legendary. Phil Hartman's Clinton was already outstanding, but then Darrell Hammond came along and took the role to new levels. Will Farrell's W? What can you say, other than "strategery"?

However, this raised a couple of questions in my mind. Aside from the obvious, "why can't they find an even half-way passable Bush since Ferrell's departure?" is this: Who played Carter? And perhaps even more importantly, who played early-Reagan (come on, the man was Commander-in-Chief for 8 years and oversaw the falling of the Iron Curtain)?

I feel I've seen a decent number of classic SNL episodes, but I cannot for the life of me ever recall seeing a Jimmy Carter skit. I know I've seen a few Hartman-as-Reagan sketches, but Hartman didn't even join the cast until 1986 (thanks Wikipedia!).

Anyway, I know that's kind of random, but it's been on my mind all day. Was there a 8-year embargo on White House lampoonery? Maybe I should dig a little deeper into Wikipedia....

Holiday Spirit

I've found it especially difficult to get into the Christmas spirit this year. I think it's safe to attribute this to two specific factors: 1) Since I'm no longer in school, there's no extended "winter break," which, let's face it would be pretty awesome right about now regardless of religious affiliation; and 2) despite the fact that I no longer live in Miami, I nonetheless step outside on December 18th to see the thermometer flashing a decidedly non-festive "75 F."

However, I think I may have found a suitable cure:

That's right...it's the "A Charlie Brown Christmas" Soundtrack CD! This is, quite possibly, the best Christmas album ever created.

Childhood nostalgia: check
Timeless characters we all know and love: check
Great music: check

Anyone who's seen the cartoon special (i.e., 95% of everyone in America) remembers how important the music was in setting the tone of the story. But even if you're part of the other 5% who has somehow managed to avoid this holiday standard your entire life, I highly recommend this CD for the musical performances alone. Vince Guaraldi and the boys definitely do it up right, and new this year is the remastered edition with several bonus track/alternate takes.

You won't be disappointed, if you have a soul. Otherwise, I make no guarantees.


**EDIT**
Yeah, I realize now that the last line of this post makes no sense and actually comes off a little creepy, but there's a simple explanation for that. Originally, I had included a sentence about how that CD "would touch the very essence of your soul," or something to that effect. Thus the "soul" theme had been established, and the last line was there to bring it all together.

However as I neared completion, I said to myself, "Self, you know that sounds like your trying a little too hard to be Will Farrell-as-James Lipton." So I took out the first part and thus shattered the whole "soul" motif.

Then I completely forgot to change the ending.

So there you go. Merry Christmas, you soul-less bastards!

Rolling Stone Shoutout! (Alternately titled: The Bill Harper Story)

So I was flipping through the latest edition of Rolling Stone today, when I saw something completely unexpected...a story focused on New Bern! Of course, the story is about how large hog farms are ruining the environment, corrupting local politics, and forcing family farms out of business, so it's not exactly a flattering article. It also refers to New Bern as "tiny," and mentions its proximity to "the densest concentration of hogs in the world." But hey, was there an article about the town you grew up in this month? I thought not!

There's also a photo of the locally-infamous "Mexican Imports" sign. For those who don't know - and there is absolutely no reason why you should - Mexican Imports is a sort of antique/junk/rare goods shop just outside of New Bern, about a mile from the house I lived in during middle school. The owner, a man named Bill Harper, is a bit of a....well, let's just say an "eccentric" fellow. In the '90s he decided to construct a large wooden billboard on the property of the store, just so he could spell out whatever happened to be his latest grievance with the government.

Not surprisingly, many local politicians weren't too happy about being called idiots on a large sign in big block letters on the side of a major highway. So then the lawsuits started. Not wanting to come across as anti-free speech, they took the zoning-violation approach in trying to bring the sign down. Harper's response? Build a make-shift shack ON TOP OF the 20+ ft-high sign, and LIVE THERE until the politicos backed off (the bottom of the shack is visible in the RS photo; sorry, can't find a link for an online version).

Eventually, though, he came down unharmed, and years later ran his own campaign for county commissioner (he even managed to get himself elected at one point). The sign remains today, informing the citizens of any little government misdeed.

Anyway, the Rolling Stone is the one out now with Snoop Dogg on the cover.
The infamous sign can be found here.
I honestly don't know what Bill Harper's up to these days.

Here's Some Music, Jerks

I love record stores. I'm not talking about the music departments at Best Buy or Target, or online browsing through Amazon or iTunes (although I've bought music from each of those establishments). I mean good, old fashioned locally-owned record shops.

The blaring music from some band you've never heard of. The kid behind the counter in the black t-shirt who thinks he's way too cool to talk to you. The CD's separated by cheap plastic dividers with the artists' names hand-written on them. That one back corner devoted entirely to local bands, and the other one where you can buy albums on vinyl. No 50-ft posters of Fergie enticing me to pick up a copy of "The Dutchess."

I found myself in just such a place on Saturday afternoon, just browsing. Stores like that have music from bands like this:

1. Kyle Andrew - Amos in Ohio
2. Hacienda Brothers - Cowboys to Girls
3. Grabba Grabba Tape - Dr Groxtronix and Lil Kul Lo
4. Tim Easton - Not Today
5. Standard - Red Drop
6. The Wrens - She Sends Kisses
7. Roman Candle - Something Left to Say
8. Over the Atlantic - Starsign
9. Cities - Writing on the Wall (isan remix)
10. Band of Horses - The First Song